A Post for Madi

Madi says she hasn't been getting enough "blog time" and that she should have her own post. It is true, that every child has had their own post lately, except for Madi. So Madi, here you go - you're very own post!

Tomorrow is your half birthday - half way to twelve! It hardly seems possible to me that we have known each other for eleven and a half years. Last night I tried to tell daddy about how my perspective of what "twelve" is has changed over time. When I was twelve, I thought I was pretty big, rather old & mature, and now, when I look at you, I don't think you are as "old" as I thought I was. This is a tough thing to express in words & daddy looked at me & said "huh?" and I had to try to explain it another way. So, if you said "huh?" to what I just said, here's another way of saying this - when I was 12, I thought I knew a lot and could do a lot, but now that I am older & have children of my own & have had a few experiences under my belt, I know that 12 is still really young. But when you're 12, I understand that you really feel you are old enough to handle lots of things without your mom tagging along, and I guess you are! I like this picture because I have seen that face you make many times before. That's the face that says, "OK, mom, whatever, just do what you have to do then leave me alone. I will tolerate you for the moment, but hurry & leave." I don't mean this in a bad way. I believe this is what you have to do to start the process of growing up, of breaking away from your mommy & experiencing things on your own. I just wish you weren't in such a hurry to grow up. I guess I shouldn't be surprised that you are in a hurry because all your life you have wanted to be older than you really are. Your closest friends have always been older & in a way, because of your quest to be independent & self-reliant, you do seem older. But then, thankfully, you do something that brings you back to the realm of little girlhood. I know those moments will become less and less over the next few years, but anytime you want to return for a few minutes of little girlhood, I'll be waiting.

Yesterday I looked over at you in church & saw that you had sneaked some mascara on those beautiful eyelashes - oh I know how it feels to want to be "big". But then in the same second, as you sat in church, you could not listen for even a minute and you could not quit bugging your sisters. That's my little girl! You are at a stage of life where you are caught between two worlds - the one you are anxious to enter and the one you are reluctant to leave behind. You are on the brink of teenage-hood, the road to adulthood. You have so much ahead of you & so many experiences to have & so many choices to make.

As you approach this new stage of life, I have a few "hopes" for you that I would like to share. I know that it is hard to believe that I have been where you have been, but the reality is, I have. And you know what, I remember being there. So these hopes I have for you come from my memories of what it is like to grow up. I know lots of things have changed since I was twelve, but a lot of things are still the same. My parents taught me the same principles and morals that dad & I are teaching you. So - these are my "hopes" for you, Madi. I hope that in the coming years you will continue to be strong and self-reliant. I hope that you will continue to make good choices & be a leader. Surround yourself with strong friends who lift you up & support you in choosing what is right. I hope you will be a good friend, that you will be kind, that you will be true. Do not gossip or talk behind your friends' backs as this always causes problems, eventually, problems - that could have been avoided. I hope that you will have a strong testimony of the gospel & of our Savior, Jesus Christ. I hope that you will come to your mom & dad when you have questions and concerns. You are always safe with us and in our home. You can come to us with any problems. The next several years will be wonderful and exciting, but there will certainly be hard times. I hope that you will have the faith to work through your problems. When the hard times come, come to your parents & your Heavenly Father with your worries and we will help you. Do not expect us to solve all your problems, because we can't and we won't because we want to help you learn to work through things on your own. I hope that you will always be beautiful on the inside as well as the outside. Beauty is so much more than a supposedly "perfect" body or "perfect" skin or "perfect" hair. Beauty is about the kind of person you are on the inside. Madi, I hope that you will love your family and enjoying spending time with us. I hope that you have fun and that you enjoy all that life has to offer you as you become a young woman. I hope that you develop your talents & have joy sharing them. I hope you are happy. I hope you are you! Love - Mom